Minerva Boss (Marriage-Testimony)

M. I’ve been concerned all my life wondering what it would be like in old age. I have seen people who were pessimistic and sour and never saw any good in life, and I’ve wondered why they are like that. I have always been interested in taking classes when I went to Education Week that had anything to do with mental and psychiatric problems, and marriage problems and how to solve them. And I have found that a lot of these problems are in a person’s thinking. But I imagine one of the hardest things would be to lose your companion. A lot of those who are having problems have lost or divorced their companions. But a lot of others would probably be happy if they could lose their’s (laughter). Some have depression because they are not married and others are depressed because they are.

I have found that marriage is certainly a serious thing. Its something we have to work on every day of our lives and we have problems all the days of our lives. And we are always going to have problems and challenges. But many people are too immature. They simply cannot grow up. They are still children. From my observations, half the problems in marriage are due to immaturity. We act so much like children when we are sulking and won’t speak, and when we can’t communicate. Why are we so immature? I don’t care how mature we are in other respects. Some people might be so intellectually brilliant in some things, but so stupid and childish in others. We certainly need to take a look at ourselves. And I’m including myself. I’ve had my problems too, and am far from perfect. I have certainly come to the conclusion that we can make happiness or hell in our marriages. It has been brought up that when people are having their families, and have big families, and are under a big strain at home they have plenty to occupy themselves. Then suddenly the family is all gone and there they are alone. Then what are they going to do? We’ve got to learn to give and take and show appreciation all the days of our lives. If we don’t there is going to be a lot of heartache and unhappiness. And we must realize that as we get older we will have problems and we have got to develop empathy and understanding and realize that we are imperfect too. I think the whole thing is mental. I think if a person will try to be mentally mature they can meet a lot of these problems. Some people cannot be told anything. They know it all. And I think people who are brilliant book wise and in learning, if they cannot communicate and come down to the level of a child and take a look at themselves they are educated in one respect but very uneducated in another. So we can make a heaven or a hell for ourselves. Some people are pessimistic all the time.

The people who impress me most are those who have a sunny outlook when you know they too are having aches and troubles to solve. Many times those are the people who have the most positive outlook on life. People are not interested in our troubles. I don’t care who they are, nobody likes to hear anybody’s troubles. But I think we should be able to communicate with people and show empathy and help people where we can. I think we can look on the sunny side of life if we want to.

I have been listening to some of the tapes from Education Week and I’ve come to the conclusion that one of the most important things in our life is knowing the Savior, and learning about Him and how he taught and what he did. And I’m to the point in my life where I have to pray several times a day. And I find I can’t accomplish anything unless I do.
One of the hardest things in my life is the problem of what to keep and what to destroy. I’m going through all my files with such a fine toothed comb, that I have got to pray many times a day for wisdom to know what to destroy and what not to destroy and where to put it and how to keep it. And I find that I am getting many answers to my prayers. Sometime even in the night. They say we can pray, but half the time we don’t listen. And that is the truth. I have got so many things to sort through, many important family things I have kept. I found a history of my grandfather, Christian Kunz, that I had written that I forgot I had. So I hope as time goes on I can learn to make more right decisions.
I am very grateful for my life and heritage, to my special parents and the kind of a home I was raised in that I was taught how to work and its value in my life, for their teachings and examples they were to me, and above all for the way I was taught the gospel of Jesus Christ. All these things have been a great influence in my life. I am most thankful for my dear husband and the love we have for each other and the many rich experiences we have had together, for our special children and their mates, and all of our dear posterity.

My sincere and earnest prayers are that we will all strive to truly keep the commandments of our Lord and Savior, that we will put forth every effort to live up to the commitments we have made and will make and that we will always desire to fully follow the counsel of our Prophet and strive to love each other and have peace and harmony in each of our homes. Prayer is a powerful influence in each of our lives and I pray that we will never cease to pray. I have a sincere testimony of the gospel. I know with no doubts that we belong to the true church. I thank our Savior for his great and marvelous sacrifice in our behalf, for the power and influence of the Prophet Joseph Smith and his willingness to seal his testimony with his blood. May our dear posterity throughout the coming years be faithful and endure to the end is my sincere wish.

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